My "thing" (Part 1)

I have this “thing” about wanting to make a difference in someone’s life. In this case, we’ll define “thing” as a “matter of concern.” Because of this “thing” I find myself focussing on what only proves to bring me disappointment and heartache. My continuous prayer has been that the Lord would take me to another level of understanding “things” from His perspective. Since He knows that the best way I learn is experientially, He has given me plenty of opportunities, with the decisions some of my spiritual children are making, to take me up on that prayer. It has been challenging for me to distinguish what is my part, God’s part and the other person’s part in any given scenario. Where does my responsibility start and where does it stop? With my natural disposition being very conscientious it makes it that much harder to draw those lines. When I’m not able to draw those lines, I blame myself for not doing enough; believing that if I had done, said or prayed more, it would have made such a difference that they wouldn’t have made such an unwise decision.

The Lord has been unraveling this belief system and revealing the truth of this “thing” I have about wanting to make a difference. I mentioned in previous blogs that I’ve been reading and meditating on the truths in the book by Philip Yancey, “Disappointment with God.” He made a point that I have never considered before. 

“A perfect God now lives inside very imperfect human beings. And because He respects our freedom, the Spirit in effect ‘subjects Himself’ to our behaviour. The New Testament tells of a Spirit we can lie to, or grieve, or quench. And when we choose wrongly, we quite literally subject God to that wrong choice.” 

Wow! This statement shook me. I had not thought about it in this way before; that He subjects Himself to our behaviour. Even God Himself won’t go against a person’s free will, which is the very gift He has given to humankind. In some strange way, He was using this to say to me, “If I can’t make a difference in a person’s life unless he or she wills me to, then how can you?” 

I am seeing more and more just how powerful our will is. Living in Cape Town, God has given me a perfect visual demonstration of this. It wasn’t long after arriving here five years ago that I encountered the strong and persistent “south-easterly” winds. It definitely wasn’t a gentle introduction, but more like a rude, gale force awakening! Experiencing first-hand the incredible force of these winds, I wasn’t surprised to see trees permanently bent over, because of the constant, unrelenting force. This is a good picture of our wills, when they are bent repeatedly toward temptation and sin. The more we say “Yes” to sin, the more our will is being bent in opposition to God’s will and heart for us. Likewise, the more we say “No” to sin, the more our wills are being bent in agreement to God’s will and heart for us. Our wills, like trees, are meant to stand upright in a place of purity and holiness. God won’t force or manipulate our wills. Neither will He plead or beg that any of us say, “Yes” to following His will. He has done His part in demonstrating His extravagant love towards us. His part is finished, complete. Our part is to make a choice with the will He has freely given us either for or against Him.